Absurd Story

Katalin Szabó


This story takes place in a house, in the street, and at a strange grocery store in the morning.

Characters:
Carl
Suzie (Carl’s wife)
Marie the cashier
little boy
elephants

(7:30 a.m.)

CARL: Good morning, honey! You won’t believe what I dreamt last night.

SUZIE: Good morning, come and tell me.

CARL: So, in my dream, I was in a flowery meadow when someone said: Go and buy an elephant! That’s why I bought an elephant somewhere. It was talking to me and it was huge. We became good or best friends, and I wanted to call you, but I woke up.

SUZIE: Wow! What a crazy dream!

CARL: (disappointed) Yeah, I wish it would happen to me once, I really want a special pet, like he was.

SUZIE: OMG! (spits out the coffee) I’m reading this newspaper about our city, and it says that a new store has opened nearby. You can buy fantastic things there (mostly food), for example bacon lollipops, flying pens, flower-shaped beds, and an elephant! What is more, it’s marked down this week.

CARL: (excited) This is great news, I have to go there and buy it before someone else does.

SUZIE: The shop opens and 10 a.m, so….

CARL: I don’t care, I want to be their first customer. Where did you say this place was?

SUZIE: It’s near the zoo, next to the flower shop; you will find it easily.

(Carl leaves home cheerfully.)

Later:

CARL: (looks at his watch impatiently) I can’t belive it! It’s 10:02 and they haven’t opened yet…

MARIE: Good morning, Carl! How can I help you?

CARL: Ohh Marie, I didn’t know you worked here.

MARIE: (starts story time) Yes, this is my new job, you know I have a big cat called Snowball, we lived together until she escaped…. After a while, she came home pregnant, and now I have to feed the baby cats, so I had to find a job to make money for cat food.

CARL: What a pity! Anyways, I’m looking for an elephant, I heard I can buy one here.

MARIE: Oh yes, he’s next to the pink peppers, but he is dangerous, be careful!

CARL: (runs to the elephant) What are you doing here?

LITTLE BOY: (cries) I want this elephant!

CARL: No!

LITTLE BOY: MOM! This rude man wants to buy my elephant. (continues to cry)

CARL: I wanted to buy him before you were born, silly kid.

ELEPHANT: (bored) Please be quiet, I’m trying to sleep!

MARIE: (running over slowly in her high heels) That’s enough, calm down! We have another elephant in stock.

CARL: Let me see him. Alright little kid, you can have this lazy boring elephant….

(The little kid leaves.)

MARIE: It’s a girl elephant, your wife will be happy to have another woman in the house. (She goes to the storage room.)

CARL: (pays and goes out happily) And now … What do you want to do?

ELEPHANT: Let’s paint our nails!