Drama

How to Become Rich

(a story-play)

Fanni Korpás


Once upon a time two cats were swimming in debt. They didn’t have enough money to pay the bills but didn’t want to go to work. They just sat in their house and waited for a miracle. At first they thought their situation was hopeless. While they were watching the news, suddenly something caught their eye. The reporter said:

“This week the Anaconda Museum sent the word’s biggest diamond to our museum. Our mayor thinks we are the safest city and the diamond is in the best place. We will take the necessary precautions. There will be no way that anyone can steal it.”

The two kittens looked at each other. They were thinking the same thing. This was their big chance. It would be the best robbery of their life. They could be rich. This is how Tim and Tom decided that to steal this diamond. While Tom went to the shop, Tim planned.

“What do you think about my plan?”

“Not bad, not bad. But I think we have to enter through two ways.”

“Okay, then. What is your idea?”

“I think one of us has to go in the back door, and the other one has to enter the room from the top of the building.”

“Isn’t that a little bit dangerous?”

“No. This is the best plan.”

“Okay, okay. But what we will do with the chocolate? Why did you buy it? Do we need it for the robbery or what?”

“I am hungry.”

“But we have pasta and meat and bread and…”

“The chocolate gives me power!”

“Do you know how many bills we have?”

“We will have so much money, so why not?”

“Okay. You are right.”

At 22:00 Tim and Tom headed off to the museum. Tim went by bus, Tom by bicycle. They arrived there at the same time. Tim used his rope to get up to the top of the museum. Luckily there were no guards. He moved towards the back door and waited for his friend’s call. When Tom got off the bus, he started to search for the back door.He found it, but there were two guards.

“Tim! Are you there?”

“Yes. Where are you?”

“Near the back door. Can you help me?”

“Of course. I thought you would call me up becouse of this.”

Tim pulled his gun out of his holster.

“Tim? Are you still there?”

“Yes, calm down. I will shoot the man, and you will shoot the woman.”

“Okay.”

Both of them started shooting, as only cats can do.

“Tom? Are you all right?”

“Yes. I’m going in.”

There were so many beautiful paintings on this room and only only one guard. The museum staff had put the diamond near this room.

“Hey Tom! What’s up?”

“There is only one guard near the room where the diamond is kept.”

“Do I have to help you?”

“No. I can do it by myself.”

Tom had a plan. There was lots of furniture in the room. He saw five pieces in his way. The guard was very tired and sometimes closed his eyes. When he did it, Tom ran under the first sofa. Then the second, and the third. He continued until he reached the last one. Then he shot the guard with his gun. Then he opened the door and looked around the room. There was nobody, just the diamond.

“Hey Tim! I am in the room.”

“How many guards do you see?”

“No one.”

“What?”

“There is nobody. It is really scary.”

“Well, anyhow, I’m throwing the rope.”

“Okay.“

As soon as Tom touched the diamond, the alarm sounded. Tom tied up the diamond quickly.

“Tom, jump onto the rope with the diamond! Our helicopter is there, and it will pull you and the diamond up!”

They went away with the diamond to Japan and ended up very rich.

The Two Turtles and the Human

Virág Dénes and Ádám Juhász


There is Rozi,the girl turtle.
There is Béla,the boy turtle.
And there is Tomi the strange human.
They are on a train.

Rozi

Well, Béla,what do you want to be when you will grow up to be a big turtle?

Béla

Hmm, good question, Rozi! I think I wanna be an astronaut! And you? What is your dream?

Rozi

Well I want to be an electrician, but if I can’t, then I wanna be a builder.

Tomi

(Kicking the door open.) Hi guys! The train is about to crash,so i would like to use this time to make friends.

Rozi

Hi, kid! How was your day? (Rozi looks confused for a second.) Wait… Aren’t you the driver?

(Tomi looks at his clothes, then looks back at the two turtles and shrugs his shoulders.)

Oh, it is no big deal, because its a Tesla train!

(Rozi & Béla look confused, but at the same time it seems they completely understand the situation.)

Béla

Come join us in our conversation about the meaning of life!

Tomi

You silly turtles, everyone knows the answer to that.

Rozi

So what is it, then?

(Tomi looks at Rozi as if she had not listened to him at all.) HOW THE HELL WOULD I KNOW? Anyways,aren’t you two supposed to be in New York?

Béla

Thanks for asking, but no, we are going to Kecskemét. I heard that the city got its name from a frog. How exciting!!

Tomi

Indeed, it’s exciting, but its not true. They named it after a dolphin.

Rozi

Haha, funny.

Tomi

I would like to inform you guys that the plane will be landing in a few moments, so make sure to exit through the windows!

Béla

Umm, who is piloting the train exactly? If you are here and the Tesla train is turned off?

(Tomi kicks the door shut and goes in the opposite direction of the cockpit.)

When Time Is Up

Sándor Tor


Characters:
Old clock
Watch

Place:
In a house.

Old clock: Hey, what are you doing, sir?

Watch: My time.

Old clock: Your time??

Watch: Yes, my time. My time is up.

Old clock: What do you mean, it’s up?

Watch: Just look at me.

Old clock: Look at you … but what should I see?

Watch: You don’t see it?

Old clock: What?

Watch: Well, how I’m getting older.

Old clock: You’re getting older? This is the best joke I’ve ever heard.

Watch: What’s so funny about that?

Old clock: It’s just that you think you’re old.

Watch: I didn’t say I was old.

Old clock: But you said you’re getting older.

Watch: OK, that’s true, but what do you mean by that?

Old clock: That you’re not old. I, maybe, but you, I doubt it.

Watch: But….

Old clock: But what? You still haven’t answered my question.

Watch: What question?

Old clock: Well, where do you want to go?

Watch: Well, I don’t know exactly.

Old clock: So you just want to run away?

Watch: Yes, what’s wrong with that?

Old clock: Wake up already … You’re just a watch.

Watch: And you? You’re not even a watch..

Old clock: I know it hurts, but you can’t just run away.

Watch: And why can’t I do it?

Old clock: I thought we had already discussed this.

Watch: Then we going to die here?

Old clock: Not necessarily.

Watch: Look! If I ask you something, I expect a normal answer.

Old clock: I mean, maybe  one day we will get out of here.

Watch: And when is that day coming?

Old clock: I don’t know.

Watch: Then how can you be so confident that it will come?

Old clock: Well, that can’t be the end, am I right?

Watch: Yes, you’re right.

Old clock: I’m glad you finally understand and don’t want to….

Watch: Yes, you’re right, and this will not be the end.

The watch starts to run and jumps off the cabinet. The old clock watches it and is sad, but this watch isn’t the first who has jumped from there.

The Weirdest Dreams

Zsófia Vona


Characters (turtles):
Tino
Cato

Place:
A playground.

CATO: I am so bored, let’s talk about something interesting. Now it’s your turn to choose a subject.

TINO: Okay, then let me think. What did you have for breakfast?

CATO: I said interesting. Do you know what that means?

TINO: Of course, I know, but I was inquisitive. If you always say that my questions do not makes sense, then why am I the one who has to pick a topic?

CATO: Because I thought you could say something meaningful this time.

TINO: Do not be rude, I can if I want.

CATO: Then show me.

TINO: So … for example, do you know what you want to be when you grow up?

CATO:  Finally, a thought-provoking question. And yeah, I know. I have always wanted to be an athlete. I think I will become a famous one in the future.

TINO: Seriously? An athlete? You? You are a turtle. What do you want to be, a sprinter? That is the biggest joke I have ever heard.

CATO: You can’t laugh at my dreams, in fact you should feel honoured because I told you this. I will show the world that a turtle can be fast too if it wants.

TINO: Of course, I will be curious about that

CATO: You are the one who asked about my dreams, I just answered.

TINO: But you are the one who said I had to ask something.

CATO: You can be really annoying sometimes, but if it is that funny, then let me hear about your dream job.

TINO: Well, to be honest, I want to be a hairdresser.

CATO: Oh, and you are the one who laughed at me. You can’t be a hairdresser, turtles don’t have hair. And anyways, an animal has never become a hairdresser.

TINO: That is true, and that is why it is cooler. I can be the first one ever. By the way, turtles can wear wigs, so my job makes sense.

CATO: And where do you want to learn the skills that you need?

TINO: I can show you. Come with me.

CATO: Why are we here? I do not think that a bakery is the best place to learn how to braid hair or anything like that.

TINO: How do you think they make the braided bread? They braid it. So, if I can make that, I can do it with hair too.

CATO: I do not think so, but maybe you are right.

TINO: Of course I am right. Do you want me to show you how am I going about it?

CATO: Show me … but hurry before I change my mind, and just to remind you, my dream job is still better than yours.

TINO: If you say so….

A Happy Ending

Zoltán Széker


One day a man went into the grocery store to buy an elephant. The situation was very absurd, but it was not the strangest thing in the story. The man who was looking for the elephant was wearing a black suit and an old-school black hat. He looked like someone who had never gone to any store before, so the people there assumed he was a spy or maybe an inspector, to the delight of the shop asisstants.

The story began on the streets of London in a grocery  shop on a gray, rainy day:

The man entered the store.

SHOP ASSISTANT: Good afternoon, sir!

MAN: Hmm.

He said only this, with a serious face, though it was covered with a black hat. The shopkeeper already figured out that he would not be a simple buyer, but she didn’t get upset, because she had to be nice to everyone who came into the store.

A few hours later the mysterious man was still looking for something. He was nervous; this could be gleaned from his way of talking to himself and using bad words.

SHOP ASSISTANT: Excuse me, but can I help you with something? Because I see you have been looking for something for a long time and thought I would ask.

MAN: No.

10 minutes later:

SHOP ASSISTANT: I’m sorry to bother you again, but are you sure I can’t help you?

MAN: Well….

SHOP ASSISTANT: Say anything, Here you can find everything you like. On this shelf you can find basic things, and here the ingredients of a good Italian dinner.

Ohh, I haven’t even mentioned the sweets here, and listen now.

Today you can get a 20 percent discount on everything.

What do you say?

MAN: Can you stop speaking just for a moment? Thanks.

SHOP ASSISTANT: Sorry, but I don’t understand why you are talking to me like that, when I’m just doing my job and trying to help.

MAN: OK. So can I tell you what I want to buy?

SHOP ASSISTANT: Yes, of course, but before that let me ask a question.

MAN: Yes, say it.

SHOP ASSISTANT: I think I’m a very friendly and intelligent person, so I’m good at my job, and most importantly I enjoy what I do. My day started really well, I sold a lot of things, now you came and I don’t understand what’s wrong with me, so now I feel bad about it.

MAN: Am I to blame for your having a bad day?

Since the woman was a sensitive person, she began to cry. But she quickly tried to collect herself, because a good shop assistant doesn’t start arguing with a customer and won’t have a bad day about it. The woman just cried and something happened that no one expected.

The rude, old man who hates lovely, smiling people suddenly hugged the crying woman.

And he said this to her (kindly):

MAN: I’m so sorry I treated you like that, I shouldn’t have done that. You are a good person and don’t cry, please.

SHOP ASSISTANT: Okay, thank you.

She became happy again and at last asked the question:

SHOP ASSISTANT: What can i do for you?

MAN: I’d like to buy an elephant.

SHOP ASSISTANT: Sorry, i didn’t hear it well. Would you repeat it please?

MAN: Yes, sure. E-L-E-P-H-A-N-T elephant.

SHOP ASSISTANT: We don’t sell toy animals, it’s a food market.

MAN: I feel we misunderstood each other. I would like a real elephant.

She burst out laughing when she saw that the man had said this seriously, so she stopped herself and started to take it seriously.

SHOP ASSISTANT: Why would you like an elephant?

MAN: Because I feel lonely, and unfortunately I don’t have any friends. I think I messed up something in my life.

SHOP ASSISTANT: No. No. You are a good person, you just didn’t get love from anyone. But today you get a friend.

MAN: Yes? Who is that?

SHOP ASSISTANT: Me.

The man turned to walk out the door and just said: Thank you so much!

This is an absurd story about a man who wanted an animal friend and got a real one.

Journey to the Moon

Zsombor Szegedi


The story takes places at Heathrow Airport in the summer of 2019. The story has two characters: a passenger and an airport  worker. The passenger’s name is Harry. The airport worker’s name is Thomas. Harry enters the airport and goes up to a ticket desk.

Harry: Good afternoon!

Thomas: Good afternoon! Can I help you?

Harry: Yes. I want to travel.

Thomas: Where do you want to go?

Harry: I want to go to the Moon.

Thomas: The Moon?

Harry: Yes. I want to go to the Moon.

Thomas: What do you want to do on the Moon?

Harry: I just want to journey to the Moon.

Thomas: Why don’t you travel to the Canary Islands?

Harry:  How is this better than the Moon?

Thomas: There are sandy beaches, hot sun, sea, palm trees in the Canary Islands, and you don’t have to wear a spacesuit.

Harry: This island isn’t too boring?

Thomas: No. The travel agency organizes many interesting programs. Anyway, there aren’t any people on the Moon; it is sure to be a boring place.

Harry: Not sure! I consider the Moon therefore exciting!

Thomas: Won’t you be frightened alone?

Harry: No, I won’t … So, is there a flight to the Moon?

Thomas: No, there isn’t any flight to the Moon.

Harry: Oh, no!!

Thomas: I’m sorry.

Harry: If there are any flights to the Moon in the future, please let me know first.

Thomas: I promise I will let you know first.

Harry: Thank you. Goodbye!

Thomas: Goodbye!

Absurd Story

Katalin Szabó


This story takes place in a house, in the street, and at a strange grocery store in the morning.

Characters:
Carl
Suzie (Carl’s wife)
Marie the cashier
little boy
elephants

(7:30 a.m.)

CARL: Good morning, honey! You won’t believe what I dreamt last night.

SUZIE: Good morning, come and tell me.

CARL: So, in my dream, I was in a flowery meadow when someone said: Go and buy an elephant! That’s why I bought an elephant somewhere. It was talking to me and it was huge. We became good or best friends, and I wanted to call you, but I woke up.

SUZIE: Wow! What a crazy dream!

CARL: (disappointed) Yeah, I wish it would happen to me once, I really want a special pet, like he was.

SUZIE: OMG! (spits out the coffee) I’m reading this newspaper about our city, and it says that a new store has opened nearby. You can buy fantastic things there (mostly food), for example bacon lollipops, flying pens, flower-shaped beds, and an elephant! What is more, it’s marked down this week.

CARL: (excited) This is great news, I have to go there and buy it before someone else does.

SUZIE: The shop opens and 10 a.m, so….

CARL: I don’t care, I want to be their first customer. Where did you say this place was?

SUZIE: It’s near the zoo, next to the flower shop; you will find it easily.

(Carl leaves home cheerfully.)

Later:

CARL: (looks at his watch impatiently) I can’t belive it! It’s 10:02 and they haven’t opened yet…

MARIE: Good morning, Carl! How can I help you?

CARL: Ohh Marie, I didn’t know you worked here.

MARIE: (starts story time) Yes, this is my new job, you know I have a big cat called Snowball, we lived together until she escaped…. After a while, she came home pregnant, and now I have to feed the baby cats, so I had to find a job to make money for cat food.

CARL: What a pity! Anyways, I’m looking for an elephant, I heard I can buy one here.

MARIE: Oh yes, he’s next to the pink peppers, but he is dangerous, be careful!

CARL: (runs to the elephant) What are you doing here?

LITTLE BOY: (cries) I want this elephant!

CARL: No!

LITTLE BOY: MOM! This rude man wants to buy my elephant. (continues to cry)

CARL: I wanted to buy him before you were born, silly kid.

ELEPHANT: (bored) Please be quiet, I’m trying to sleep!

MARIE: (running over slowly in her high heels) That’s enough, calm down! We have another elephant in stock.

CARL: Let me see him. Alright little kid, you can have this lazy boring elephant….

(The little kid leaves.)

MARIE: It’s a girl elephant, your wife will be happy to have another woman in the house. (She goes to the storage room.)

CARL: (pays and goes out happily) And now … What do you want to do?

ELEPHANT: Let’s paint our nails!

Buying an Elephant

Botond Vass


Characters: customer, shopkeeper, manager

The customer enters the grocery store.

CUSTOMER
Good afternoon.

SHOPKEEPER
Good afternoon, sir. How may I assist you?

CUSTOMER
I’m just wandering around.

SHOPKEEPER
Are you sure? You seem like you are looking for something but can’t find it.

CUSTOMER
To be honest, I saw a commercial that said I can buy some kind of elephant here.

SHOPKEEPER
Are you sure you came to the right place, sir? This is a grocery store, and I don’t think we sell any kind of elephant here.

CUSTOMER
Well, the commercial was on a billboard, and it had the name of this place on it and that they sell these elephant things here.

SHOPKEEPER
If you are willing to wait a couple seconds, I will ask the manager. I’m sure he can help you.

CUSTOMER
I would be grateful if you asked him.

SHOPKEEPER
I will be back in a minute.

The shopkeeper enters the manager’s office.

SHOPKEEPER
Sir, there is a customer outside who saw an advertisement that said we sell some kind of elephant here.

MANAGER
(spits out his coffee) We sell what here?

SHOPKEEPER
Some kind of elephant, sir.

MANAGER
He must be drunk or something. I will see what I can do. In the meantime, would you be so kind to clean the coffee up?

SHOPKEEPER
Of course, sir.

The manager leaves his office.

MANAGER
Good day to you, sir. I’ve heard that you are looking to buy an elephant here, but the problem is that we don’t sell any of those here, since this is a grocery store. (While he says all of this, he starts walking around, with the customer following him.)

CUSTOMER
I know they don’t sell elephants in grocery stores, but I was curious because the advert said they sell them here.

MANAGER
There must have been a mistake with the advertisement then. We are sorry, sir, but there isn’t any elephant here. I will take care of it and get the advertisement removed from the billboard.

CUSTOMER
No problem, sir. Mistakes can happen, don’t worry about it…. (Raising his voice.)

 There! There they are!

MANAGER
Sir, those are eggplants, not elephants.

CUSTOMER
But it says on the tag that these are… (leaning closer) Ohh, sir. I totally forgot that I have dyslexia and I must have misread it. My apologies for wasting your time with this nonsense, sir.

MANAGER
It’s totally fine, mistakes can happen, as you said. At least we both will have a story to tell once we get home.

CUSTOMER
Sure thing, we will. I don’t want to waste your time anymore. Have a nice day, sir!

MANAGER
Nice day to you too!

The Wordless Crime

Boglárka Trenovszki


King: Where have you been all this time, Albert?

Albert: I’m really sorry, your Highness, we were investigating the egg-crime.

King: Oh, I see, you caught that scoundrel. So you are the reason why I couldn’t eat scrambled eggs for breakfast yesterday! I hope you know you are in huge trouble, Mr. Egg-thief. I hope you have great excuses, so speak.

Silence.

King: I said speak, I’m the king, so do what i say! Or else I have to use my methods….

Still no word.

King: I’m starting to lose my patience, do you know what happens to those who don’t obey my commands? I’m sure you wouldn’t like to experience it.

Silence.

King: I see you are getting nervous. Wait a moment … You didn’t take a bow when you came in … This is one of the most disrespectful things you can do to a real king. Why aren’t you say anything?

Silence.

You are too stupid even to speak? Or did somebody cut your tongue out because of your crimes?

Silence.

ALBERT! This bad boy deserves the most exciting treatment in the castle. Take him to our biggest apartment, it’s known as jail, I’m sure you will have fun there.

Pause.

And now go, you disrespectful, evil creature! I don’t want to see you anymore!

Albert grabs his neck and tries to bring him to the door.

Albert: Damn, this evil monster just tried to bite me!

Finally the guards force the criminal out.

King: I still can’t believe how living beings can steal my breakfast….

Albert: Me neither, but your Highness, don’t you think this procedure was too cruel for a dog? He will bark in jail all day!

Playing by the Rules

Fanni Kepenyes


CHARACTERS:
ZEUS
POSEIDON
HADES
ATHENA

SCENE:
The three gods are on Olympus, watching three of their demigod children fighting.

ZEUS: It is obvious that my son will win, I am the king of the gods. I am the strongest one.

HADES: Don’t make me laugh. It is obvious that my daughter is better than any of your children.

POSEIDON: She is a girl; she can’t defeat two boys.

HADES: She is the daughter of the god of death. She can easily destroy both of them.

ZEUS: Well, if she could, she would have done it already. Whoa, do you think your son survived that blast, Poseidon?

POSEIDON: He obviously did. I bet ten drachmas that Zeus’s son will be the first to die.

ZEUS: Ten drachmas that it will be your son.

HADES: While you make bets, I will watch my daughter beat both of your sons and win without an injury.

POSEIDON: Zeus, don’t you think Hades is a bit egotistic over this? Your daughter is definitely the second to die; she might have enough power to kill Zeus’s son, but she will be exhausted after that.

ZEUS: Agreed. But she will kill your son.

POSEIDON: Wait, who is that girl?

Athena enters the scene.

ATHENA: That is my daughter. She has an alliance with Hades’ kid. They have the perfect plan to kill the other two. After all, Hades is the god of death, and I am the goddess of wisdom and strategy. Any new bets on who will win?

HADES: Told you all she is going to kill them.

POSEIDON: That is not fair. I made a bet, Hades, that your daughter would lose this fight and die. I might lose twenty drachmas.

HADES: You are worried about the money, while your son is risking his life?

POSEIDON: Well it would be sad if he died, but I have plenty of other sons to step in his place.

ATHENA: You are so insensitive.

ZEUS: That is not fair. Your daughter Athena made a perfect plan, and your daughter Hades just raised the dead. You both cheated!

HADES: Give me your twenty drachmas, Zeus, your son just died.

ZEUS: I am not giving you any money. I am the king of the gods; I am not afraid of you.

HADES: You were talking about cheating just a moment ago; what do you think you are doing now? Give me your money, or I will tell Hera that you are cheating on her again!

ZEUS: You are too scared to talk to her about it.

HADES: Watch me. Last time it didn’t end well with Hercules; that poor guy had to go through some stuff. If I talked to her, what would happen to your youngest kid, then?

ZEUS: Okay, fine, but this is the last time you get any money from me.

ATHENA: Poseidon, in your place I would try to save my son, or money.

POSEIDON: I guess I should make him just disappear from there.

HADES: You are cheating. It is forbidden; you can’t just make him disappear.

POSEIDON: Well, it is too late now.

ATHENA: But our kids still won, so you owe us twenty drachmas.

POSEIDON: That is not fair! You tricked me!

ATHENA: It is not my problem that you fell for it! Give me your money or suffer the consequences!